is the shit, son.
To: The Girl on the Vespa that hit my car on Folsom Street in Boulder, CO this past Saturday.
RE: My Car
Hi,
I just wanted you to know that my car is fine, it only has a minor scratch from you hitting it with the handlebar of your Vespa/Vespa-like scooter.
In the future, you might want to stop and apologize instead of driving off. I’m not an angry person by nature, but there are some mentally unbalanced fools who’d run you off the road for doing that.
All the best,
J-Roc
America has elected its first black president. Congratulations, and FUCK YOU JOHN MCCAIN.
FroGuy, RowTow.Com circa 2000
J-Roc is a horrible graphic designer and he keeps making terrible looking shirt designs for Rowtow, here’s the latest:
I’m shocked and dismayed at you goddamn republicans, you tried to turn my girls with glasses fetish into something dirty and wrong.
What’s next, my Mrs. Robinson fetish?
OH, SHIT.
SERIOUSLY FUCK YOU.
(that said, I’d still hatefuck Sarah Palin. Anal only, though.)
A very good warning in the case of Bascule.
Perfecting the fish takes time and practice, but can be applied to anything in your daily life. We’re even starting to see statues dedicated to fishing pop up. It certainly seems to be getting athletes far these days. This man used his fishing skills to advance in rugby, and this fine wrestler has coined his vicious fish “The Butt Drag”. Check it out.
The coolest Scientologist ever! The man made some very memorable music in the 70s, winning an Oscar for his theme to the movie Shaft and went on to act in his own awesome blaxploitation movie, Truck Turner! His first two albums, Hot Buttered Soul and Black Moses are both excellent records that anyone who has more than a passing interest in 70s soul and funk should own. He was awesome as the Duke of New York in John Carpenter’s Escape from New York. His version of “Walk on By” is one of the funkiest songs ever. The man accomplished a lot in his life.
Oh and he was on some poorly animated cartoon for a while. I think he played a chef.
Freak out to the trailer for Truck Turner:
And treat your ears to “Walk on By”:
Doubt we’ll ever make ‘em but what do you think:
indeed.
Some kid baked up some cookies and candy, laced them with LSD and gave them to a bunch of police stations under the ruse of being a gift from Mothers Against Drunk Drivers! At least 3 officers have gotten “sick”, or had mind blowing, life changing experiences that will enrich their spiritual and/or intellectual lives for years to come.
A College student is holding the Eucharist hostage from a catholic church. Let me explain something, if you’re not familiar with Catholicism: Catholics believe in a miracle of transubstantiation, which is that after the communion wafer is blessed by a priest, it transubstantiates into the flesh of Christ. So by taking this blessed wafer this guy is holding the flesh of Christ hostage, to these Catholics. To everyone else he’s holding a crappy tasting cracker hostage.
Research in Motion, makers of the Crackberry Blackberry has a website for potential hirees that is called www.rim.jobs. SERIOUSLY.
Sascha Baron Cohen, aka Ali G/Borat, is filming a new movie for his character “Bruno” which promises to do everything with homophobia that Borat did for mainstream American prejudice to foreigners and minorities. As one of his pranks he booked two fake UFC style cage fights in Arkansas and advertised low ticket prices + dollar beer. The retarded hicks who showed up were horribly shocked to find that instead of two half naked men beating the shit out of each other, they were instead watching two half naked men make passionate love to each other.
The biggest racist piece of shit ever to serve in our Senate finally kicked the bucket this past friday, appropriately it was Independence Day here in America, I can think of no better way to celebrate our freedom than by having this douchebag shuffle off this planet.
I may be taking this whole thing a little personally, due to sharing the same first name with this asshole, but here’s probably the best image to memorialize Jesse Helms:
Andres Serrano’s Piss Christ, Jesse Helms’ favorite work of art.
I happened to be at the grocery store on this day and I bought a 3.2 tallboy of PBR for the LULZ.
They could stop me from buying booze, but they couldn’t stop me from drinking Listerine!
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