Help a brother out. Paypal link, fool, send him some scrilla so the guy can rock one of these Chemical Toilets from Walmart!
Archive for the 'Failex Reports' Category
yeah, well, bascule’s PS3 stopped working.
We can only blame Alex.
Bascule has already thrown a pillow at the couch and said bummer, the univeral hippie expression of dismay.
Fairweather Fan Alex Springer has jumped ship from the Red Sox to the Rays just in time to infect them with failure and cost them their first world series.
Congratulations to the Phillies on winning their first series since 1980.
He’s hopped on the Rays bandwagon, much like he did the Red Sox when the whole “reverse the curse” meme was blowin’ up. I’m sure he’ll be supporting a new team next year after the rays bite the big one.
The Rays Gay It Up After Winning the ALCS!
If Super Failure was AIDS, Alex would be Patient Zero. His failing has gotten so bad that it’s spread like cancer to his favorite baseball team, the Boston Red Sox, who just lost the ALCS to the fuckin’ Tampa Bay Rays. A FUCKING EXPANSION TEAM.
Note: this girl only exists in your masturbation fantasies.
Alex has decided that Trailer Park Life is for him.
Note: This is what alex will be fuckin' soon
So yeah, Kreig flipped out and attacked Alex with a rocks glass at Satire. Ironic, I know. Anyway he’s now in the hoosgow until further notice. Buy a shirt if you want (he doesn’t get any of the money).
For when you just have to throw a pint glass at a friend.
Here’s the latest scoop on alex’s adventures in failing:
Alex hates Kreig. Kreig hates Alex. So you’d think inviting the two of them to breakfast at Dougherty’s would be an idea that most people would reject outright.
Sadly not.
Any how, Alex got pissed at Kreig, got into some manner of fisticuffs with him, which went unnoticed by bar security, then 5 minutes later chucked a pint glass of water at Kreig, missing him but beaning Cy on the noggin. Luckily for all involved, but especially Cy, the glass did not shatter and Cy was just left with a sore jaw.
Alex and Kreig were then both 86′d permanently from the establishment, with Alex returning 10 minutes later wearing a “disguise” of a new shirt and sunglasses, claiming he needed to find his cellphone. He was then forcibly removed from the bar by the owner/cook/bouncer, who threatened to beat him up.
All in all a sucessful day for Alex.
Alex here, I thought I’d spit at you my list of the to 10 hottest bitches of all time:
10 – Bea Arthur
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