RowTow 2.0

I’m really not sure why I haven’t made this bitch the bitch of the day yet.  She rules.  She plays Deborah Morgan, the sister of title-character Dexter Morgan on Showtime’s Dexter.  I’d like to describe her features as vaguely Asian.  Perhaps her ancestors got raped by Mongolians like Laura Silvernman.

I can’t speak for the real life Jennifer Carpenter, but Deb Morgan swears like a sailor, which for whatever reason is a huge turn-on for me.  Seriously, sometimes it’s hard to believe the shit that comes out of her mouth.  Shit like “Thank the baby fucking Jesus.”  How goddamn motherfucking awesome.  I want to fucking marry this bitch and together we can thank the baby fucking Jesus.

J-Roc has informed me that he does not approve of her new, shorter haircut, but that really doesn’t subtract anything from her overall appeal.  I mean shit yo, she’s motherfucking hot!  It’s a bit concerting that she’s playing a cop, especially one who ostensibly hates pot.  I just have to wonder if she puffs mad bowls after she gets done taping Dexter, going “rofl I play a cop on TV.”  Probably not, but I can dream, can’t I?

Hey Jennifer Carpenter, next time you’re in the general Boulder area I’ll totally puff bowls with you.